Photo by pshutterbug used with permission.

A lot of people think that work-life balance isn’t possible or that having it all isn’t possible. Here’s what I wish everyone knew about achieving them both.

Work-life balance means different things to different people

No two people will want to have the same level of work-life balance.

For a lot of my clients, balance includes being able to spend quality time with their children while working in a meaningful career that gives them a sense of purpose and identity that’s different from being a mom.

But how we slice up that pie between time with our kids and time on work is different for everyone.

Find out what works best for you and your family.

We’ll never have balance if we work today to rest tomorrow

Tomorrow never arrives. In order to gain balance, approach today and every day with a balance-seeking mindset. Plan for it and to consistently implement that plan. The following question can help:

If I could have totally integrated balance—imagine your business/career, family, and personal areas are in perfect harmony together—what steps do I need to take today to get closer to that?

We really can have it all

I know what you’re thinking: that I’m blowing smoke up places that shouldn’t have smoke blown. Hear me out on this one.

Having it all isn’t about having or being all the things we want. It’s about what we think those things will give us.

So start by looking at what you really want. Not the trappings. Look at those things that you think those trappings will give you.

For example, happiness frequently comes up in my coaching conversations: “When I achieve X, I’ll be happy.”

Things, achievements, and accomplishments won’t make you happy. And if they do, that happiness will be short-lived. Only you can make yourself happy. START by being happy!

When we start with the end result in mind, we can truly have it all. Take some time to reflect on what you’re striving for, and then take some more time to think about what it is that those things will give you. What do you truly want? Then look within and find it.